How to Keep People Out of Jail

So Mr. Clowd has been nagging me about not posting on this blog yet.  I have been racking my brain trying to figure out what I want to blog about, and I got nothing! He finally told me to just write something, so here we go.  Throughout my day, especially while doing something I find unpleasant, I think to myself "if people had to do this while they were in jail, they would never go back to jail." Weird thought, I know, but having five kids has made me lost my mind.  So, back to the jail thing, I think if inmates had to do/handle some of these things, our jails would be EMPTY...

• I would give them 3 piles of laundry and have them fold them and put them away, only to come back multiple times during the day and destroy the folded clothes and tear them off the hangers and make them start over. Lets face it, laundry is never done and clothes are constantly needing to be washed and put away.  This alone would make me NEVER commit a crime, heck I wouldn't even go 2 miles above the speed limit.
• I would make all inmates have a kidney stone once a month.  If you have ever experienced a kidney stone ENOUGH SAID.
• They would be required to buckle and unbuckle multiple car seats at least one hundred times a day.
• At all meal times they would be required to hold a baby (obviously not a real baby because they are felons) but something that grabs the plate and throws it on the floor, cries all the way through every meal ever eaten, and is harder to hold than a greased pig because of all the squirming.
• Also at said meals, they would have to clean up at least 3 spilled drinks.  3 is on a good day at our house, so we could up the amount to 5-10 per meal.
• Walking would not be allowed, they can only duck walk.  If you have ever done Jillian Michael's Ripped in 30 video you can understand how awful duck walking ever would actually be.
• They would be required to clean up the entire jail just to turn around and find it a total disaster as soon as they are done.
• While sleeping at night, they would be woken up every hour by someone that needs a drink, someone puking, someone having a night terror and sleep walking, or just someone that is done sleeping. Just for fun we could wake them up every 30-45 minutes.
• During shower time, they would be required to deal with someone crying, fighting, needing a snack right this second, and they would have to run in and out of the shower multiple times to meet the needs of said people.
• The last thing, they would each have a pet pig that would have to be bathed and then be thrown into a pile of mud to have to be bathed again and then thrown again into the mud pile. This would continue ALL DAY LONG.

Image Courtesy: Pixgood.com